Sunday, December 15, 2019

Happy Lights

I saw lights and I was happy.
I'm still happy.
I didn't think I would feel that way.
I thought we'd just go walk around with Hennessy and look at Christmas lights around a street that has a lot of lights.
But it was weird.
After awhile, I just got this happy feeling.
There was a Santa in a chair on one of the streets.
I didn't go up to him and neither did Hennessy or Jennifer.

People patted Hennessy and one kid thought she was a wolf.
That's funny.
Sometimes people thinks she's a wolf.
She isn't but she looks like one a little bit.
She's not though, and never bites anyone. They just pet her. And they feel happy too.
There are a lot of happy people here.
It's not too cold. And it's not too late, and that's good cause we have school tomorrow.
We walked around for about a hundred hours.
There was one thing where you could put your head inside and take a picture. There were snowflakes on the houses. There were lights on top of the house too, and on the grass.
I didn't know I would feel this good after doing this.
But I do.
Almost like I am 7 again.
And anything can happen.

In the world.
With all these lights.

Santa Is Real

OK folks, here what's true
Uh-huh, so here is the deal
Turns out ... who the hell knew?
Yes ... Santa is real!
Now I know what you're thinking
You may be thinking that I'm nuts
But I've got a suspicion sinking
There's no ifs, ands or buts
It came to me while walking
It came to me today
My wife and I were talking
And I just had to speak up and say
Hey Santa is real, it turns out!
I had an epiphany
On top of roofs we should shout
Someone alert a symphony
Music and bells should blast
Children shall be alerted
An eternal Saint Nick at last
No longer are we deserted

Now this may all appear too deep
Or what's the word: "esoteric”
It may all exist below sleep
Transcending all that’s barbaric
It’s abstruse, obscure, arcane
Enigmatic, inscrutable or abstract
Cryptic, complex, complicated … insane
Or simply devoid of fact
But maybe it is profound
What I learned on my walk today
Heck, it’s simply what I’ve found
As I try to find my way …

If we can make up war
And devils of every kind
From the excitable to the bore
We create everything we find
If we can make up the daily news
Whether real or imagined true
Singing to glory or the blues
Knowing what we always knew
If we create our own reality
We choose what we must defend
Selecting the senseless or the sanity
Defining our enemy and friend
They say Adam named everything
Everything he put his hands on
And now we’ve learned how to sing
As the band steadily marches on
If the eastern spiritual dudes
Can determine all is an illusion
We are making up all our feuds
And embracing the dull delusion
Now lovers fight over nothing
Angry, they are tied to be fit
Looking for substance in the something
We make up all this shit
Into a hurricane we can be hurled
Searching for eternal love
And stumble along in a secret world
With Gabriel's "What is it we were thinking of?"

So if we can be so inventive
And manifest a world like this
Can we find a deeper incentive?
And follow our own true bliss
Can we imagine a world in kind
And picture ourselves in a boat on a river
What is it we could ultimately find?
Where could we be delivered?

In a world of pure imagination
We could eat all the dishes
Overcoming all consternation
Diving into the well of wishes
Here is where we can start anew
The depth of what we see, know and feel
Where love, giving, acceptance is true
And – yes - Santa is real
Yes … Santa is real

Sunday, November 17, 2019

Egos, Tyrants and Kings

This started with that agitation knowing that certain folks choose to be all choosy when returning voicemails, e-mails and text ... as if there isn't another human being on the other end looking for a connection. And then it just led onward.

At the end of the day, when all has been said
There will be the will of the living, and memories of the dead
There will be times of consideration by those who truly cared
There will be blankets and cookies and treasures that were shared
There will be sacrifices made by parents for their young
There will heroes who embraced the good for everyone
And then yet, there will be culprits whose hubris overruled everything
Watch out for the egos, tyrants and kings

They arrive in the night and take just for themselves
They'll drown out common courtesy with whistles and bells
Their conversations leave you invisible; it's all about them
What they've done, what they believe, and where they have been
They'll interrupt you as you speak, in the middle of your speech
They play the game of avoidance, a desperate hide and seek
You are just a meaningless prop, and they are everything
Beware of the egos, tyrants and kings

The appearance is shifty; they take many forms
They dismantle etiquette, standards and norms
Life is all on their terms; they get their own way
Agreements, contracts, commitments destroyed ... no matter what you say
At times their influence is subtle, the impact at first slight
Though one thing is settled ... they are always right
They need not call you back; they pick and choose what to do
Unless they need something, then it's "Hey, how are you?"
Responses to pleas for help, they weigh it in their mind
They hold leverage over what's meek, gentle and kind
Amidst this self-absorption, there is no care, no hope
It’s only a matter of time before the cutting becomes cutthroat
They are the snake that bites, the scorpion that stings
They are the underbelly – the egos, tyrants and kings

But in our power of choice, we can send them on their way
There will be nothing to explain, nothing to say
They've taught us a lesson, a high vision to keep
Reflecting back our own way we played hide and seek
We crouched behind their reign so we could all play so small
And avoid what would be our higher self's sweet call
Controlling, limiting and censuring ourselves all this time
Degrading, disrespecting, devaluing our precious higher mind
So with no make wrong, but only make right, we take a new stand
To be who we really are, and do all that we can
To embrace that inner culprit, he knew not what he did
He found his own way to keep it all hid
But now ushering everyone, and everything, out into the light
A brand new horizon is clearly in sight
The dove takes to the skies, the angel siren sings
God bless the egos, tyrants and kings

James Anthony Ellis a writer who can be reached at

Tuesday, October 15, 2019

You’re Not Welcome Here

Shyness whispers in my ear; despondency responds
One sure truth is all so clear, nowhere do I belong
As friends disappear, there comes to mind a lonely open door
The past appears, and now I recall the losses from before
There are no real surprises … just the echoes down the hall
And then the belief arises: "You’re not welcome here at all"

An absent mother didn’t see the medals I could have worn
A jealous brother oh so mean, saying: “It was better before you were born”
Hide and seek in the yard, you played it without inviting me
Math and speech so hard, I could barely manage a D
There were the cliques in high school, the athletes would gather inside
You know I just wasn’t that cool, the elites kept me outside
The dates I had were fine, and the relationships sublime
Yet fate would lead me blind, until connections left me behind
One betrayal after the other, I question if I can go on
Can I handle another chance to see where I don’t belong?
Not ever knowing where to start, or when to say what to say
And then even my own heart, found a way to keep me at bay
With little gratitude, I saw only the lack before my eyes
Even in solitude, my thoughts would attack my own disguise
Holding up a tight clenched fist, no relief, just a trip turning into a fall
Arising from a mindset mist, that belief: “You’re not welcome here at all”

And then alas it does come: a new mind, a new thought
No matter how far I’ve run, it was time that I got caught
Gradually, from place to place, the movement had begun
Finally, face-to-face, I saw the reflection of the one
Let’s hold it out, give it birth, and breathe a brand new breath
Let’s scream and shout, in our rebirth, seizing a timely death
A healed mind realizes what to do, and also what to know
A feeling kind, a path so true, in this time to grow
Full of grace and with loving release, we cut away what does not serve
With a steady pace, we shift beliefs, and accept what we deserve
Could the original thought be wrong, could we change a belief gone astray?
Could it be that I do belong, in a reality where it’s safe to say?
Yes, just in time, we secure a new phase, heeding the angels’ call
And now we decline and turn back the phrase: sorry ... you are not welcome here at all
You’re not welcome here at all

Sunday, September 15, 2019

It Starts and Ends With You

For years, I have worked alongside many activists and advocates on the path of bringing peace, love and freedom, helping to heal any abuse or violence that exists in our society. However I want to make sure we don't overlook something important in our pursuit. 

You say you know just what to do
You share your vision, sparkling new
Impassioned to make a difference now
There's only one catch ... but how ... but how?
Peace is on the radar; peace is the goal
Everyone line up for your honorable role
The public is calling; the people are in need
You seek to plant the righteous seed
But where can you start on a path that's true?
Could it be ... it starts and ends with you?

Dinners and awards ceremonies with settings so fine
Your activism has arrived just in time
Studying and analyzing collective mores and norms
The target is to end violence and abuse in all its forms
No more domestic terrors, the bites that sting
But we may be forgetting one small thing
The attacks, the leverage, the bitter blows
A hidden experience the victims do not know
The mystery to be ultimately solved, in time due
Yes, it starts and ends with you

Not just the political plans and the helping hands
Nor the parades led by marching bands
Not just the counseling that uplifts the trodden-down
Not just the clothing, toothpaste, handouts passed around
Not the speeches, public screeches, and promotional platitudes
Not the outer giving to the causes counting into the multitudes
No, we commence and complete with a stand for the one
The place where we always could have begun
The source of violence and abuse to which we now attend
Those inner voices and beliefs – the start and the end

Those places within lacking the light and the love
Those times you tell yourself, “I am not good enough”
I’m just an imposter here, pretending, a fake, a crook
I hate myself, I hate my hair, I hate my looks
Reflections in mirror reveal that which we do not like
Battling ourselves, we take on the dishonorable fight
The monkeys causing mayhem in the cages of our mind
Bodies that are clenched, hearts that are closed, eyes that are blind
Going through the motions, everything going numb
Until we completely beat ourselves up – “How could I be so dumb?”
Our past emerges like monsters surfacing from the sea
A hungry fiend unleashed on our present-day reality

But is this how it really has to be?
Or is there another pathway for the free?
What would happen if the wars ended, from within?
At this cease-fire, could we then begin again?
Could we un-cage the monkeys, dissolve the angry fiend?
Waive the surrender flag, and then start fresh and clean
For the public is calling; people are in need of peace
We must find the key for their, and our, release
We can begin anew, taking a path that is true
As we discover right now ... it starts and ends with you

Saturday, September 14, 2019

The Tops of Trees

It’s all happening down here
The dance of destruction, dismay and fear
Landing, standing on the ground
Look at what we’ve found
Spinning, spinning, spinning around
The Earth, for what it’s worth
Is your home of mayhem or mirth
We often perceive the darkness, downtrodden and disease
When we forget the view from the tops of trees

The roots crawl deep as we fall asleep
Bypassing the blessing and bliss
And an angel’s everlasting kiss
The feathers blow, chaotic, to the wind
Losses overshadow every win
Can we please begin?
Not just seeing what the devil and demon sees
But rather that which nests in the tops of trees

The tops of trees
Will we ever see?
What must we believe?
And who must we be?
To finally see
The tops of trees

Yes, our opportunity is here
Disengaging from the taste and temptation of fear
We start a new and fanciful dance
We climb up … like a kid … branch by branch by branch
Like a kite or a bird
Or the truth found in word
Nothing too absurd
To take us to the very tippy top
Needing more than a skip, a jump or a hop
Above the roots, up the trunk
Distractions and delusions – all have shrunk
We ascend the tree, higher ever higher
Embracing the courage of performers atop high wire
A belly full of fire
To the supreme pinnacle, we now can perceive
And fly ever skyward over the tops of trees

The tops of trees
We rarely ever see
Not from our vantage view
Stuck in what we do
The tops of trees
We rarely see
A higher point above
A landscape of light and love
The tops of trees
We can finally see
We can finally see

Thursday, August 15, 2019

The Invisible Scar

A piece of prose about the scars we cannot see, but ones that impact us still 

Where do we look, when observing the scars of life
A scratch from our dog, a puncture wound from kitchen knife
A skateboard accident, it threw you five feet high
It's not what you meant, communication gone awry
A hurtful word, spoken in an angry moment's heat
An addiction habit that you can't help but repeat
A surgery's reminder that a doctor visited here
A child's neglect, abuse, molest, terror and fear
From the dent deep, a fender bender on a favorite car
To the unsettling sleep, whispering a subconscious, silent scar

Scars I cannot feel
Scars I cannot see
Scars I cannot heal
Scars that are a part of me

And so, even in dismay, we make a path our way
Traversing through the troubles of the day
Bruised in the battles, bones and egos broken
We search for salve, that truth to be spoken
The mirror reflects the ugliness directly back at us
When we lose face, lose faith, lose the will to trust
Yet persevere we must, holding onto sun behind cloud
Seeking the higher reflection, the angel's voice crying loud
Hearing the song of the soul that, at once, we can embrace
Leaving us still, in surrendered will, in the glory of our grace
Yes, as you arrive, fully alive, you'll see it was never far
Guided on, all along, behind the sacred, silent scar

Scars that show you what to feel
Scars that see you through
Scars that love will ultimately heal
Scars that are not you

Monday, July 15, 2019

Elijah Will Decide

My nephew's kid, coming up, heaven sent, all in the right timing. When asked the due date, the expected mother said "Elijah will decide." Ah, sounds like a poem.

The dawning light belongs to nature’s will
The dusk at night echoes a silence, still
The wind ushers through the valley, a faint wisp
Planets align whenever eternity calls for eclipse
The muse cups an ear and whispers the call of love
The Divine discards fear with an expansive view from above
Flowers bloom, gardens blossom – all in the right time
Trees stretch skyward, a destiny they are sure to find 
A womb cradles the sacred seed of life inside 
The day of arrival? Yes, Elijah will decide
Elijah will decide

The underlying intention is clearly made
Worry not, worry not; do not be afraid
There is enough of everything that we could ever need
For he is born from the infinite, that miracle sacred seed
The choice made with voice – it carries us home anew
When it comes the time to act, we’ll know just what to do
For those walking in the wilderness, knowing not where to begin
Will point in the right direction, turning their hearts back again
Taking a stand with hand in hand we’ll heed the flowing tide
The direction? Which way? Yes, Elijah will decide
Elijah will decide
And so we surrender once more, again, for the sake of all
And know we will arise when the Lord comes to call
As with the transitions: winter, summer, fall and spring
And the everlasting song, as the chimes of freedom ring
The clock on the wall just knows the moment to strike
The shepherd cares for a flock … mother, sister, father and brother alike
A family gathered in symbolic circle, pointing towards the one
In timeless anticipation of eternity … finally begun
Open to the miracle, open with nothing left to hide
The day and time of our rebirth? Yes, Elijah will decide
Elijah will decide
Elijah will decide

Saturday, June 15, 2019

Love’s Momentum

I wrote this prose in June 2019 after recollecting a peak experience of awakening I had one day 20 years ago. It was 1999, and I was in a car with a girlfriend and two of her young daughters, aged 4 and 7. The two girls were singing along to the tune on the radio: "I want it that way" by the Backstreet Boys. For that moment, in the sweet harmony of sisters, the pure innocence of pure love filled the space. I was immersed in the full beauty of hearts free to express themselves. Even today, upon reflection, I can remember how love demolishes the insanity of this world of duality. 


Bursts of broken glass blow apart structures once sturdy
Cleansing from within the diseased, the downtrodden, the dirty
The peeling off of the dry and dead – reality’s skin
Crushing the delusions of every place we’ve been
Laughable, all stress – in an instant – melts to the ground
An open sky – space brothers smile at what we’ve found
Celebration rumbles up from underground roots
The return of the Lord of Lords, the truth of truths
No more need for forgiveness, retribution, reparation
Nor the desperate propaganda to keep us all in separation
No longer preoccupied with agony’s desire for attention
Fuck that – here it comes – yes it’s love’s momentum

It started from the first explosion of soul – a divine spark
Tumbling earthbound for the joyful excursion into the dark
Duality dripped upon us until we fell for it hook, line and sinker
Drowning our sorrows in poison – a lonely, early morning drinker
Buried in soot, buried in denial, barely a breath to exhale
Covered up – veil upon veil upon veil … upon veil
Even prayers leave us in despair, believing no one will ever be there
When all that is wanted is the face of someone, anyone, who cares
So we search – as we plunder, blunder, slumber along
Every step, deeper into the test, learning right from wrong
One hand clapping, our primordial face – all of life’s conundrums
Will it come - where is the eternal, the source … love’s momentum?

It is here, it is here, do not despair
Every time we proclaim that life is not fair
Seeds will bloom, given room, in full magic and splendor
Soothing all sores, healing all wounds … all so tender
Miracles arising everywhere – glimmering underneath dreams that are buried
The yin and the yang, the above and the below – forever married
Seen in anonymous donation, God’s invisible helping hand
Seen in two young sisters, in sweet harmony, singing glories of the latest boy band
Seen in the laughter of the child who recalls not history’s hell
Seen in in sublime response to prayer from our own wishing well
Seen in the dramas and karmas playing out in divine detail
Seen in the transcendent lesson gifted us every time we fail
Seen in the light of our life that often eludes our worldly attention
It is here, it is here, it is here … look for it … love’s momentum

Monday, April 15, 2019

So Taxing

Let’s ponder this fact, once proposed as an act
That would bellow abundance for all
To pay for the battle we all posthumously wanted
For – no worries – a limited time only
Never to rise above 5 percent … or so
So that …
So that …
So what?
To ultimately justify the siphoning of your soul
For your labor
For the sweat on your brow
For you – the new cash cow

While elites laugh over the 16th, designed by the poor to milk the rich
What a bitch
The switch that transformed the easy ride for the low
Into a money pit where income and life-energy would flow
Once a chance to grow … with other people’s money
But now look – how funny!
One big tax code, getting fatter and fatter and fatter
Like cattle to the slaughterhouse, we are funneled right into our fate
Now too late
To overturn the indoctrination that would, in absolute insanity, make a taxable event of your labor
Save the favor
Five generations deep, we’re all asleep
To the nightmare that allows the controllers to use our money
For what?

For wars
For Clintons, Bushes and Gores
For spaceships
For spaceshit
For bullshit
For senseless scientific studies that belie the scientific method
For expensive red tape
For plans to populate, with pins, a checkerboard map made of nations
For strategies to desecrate and defile other people’s homes and bodies
For black-tie events and the armed guards that protect them
For the overlord 1040 and 540, now legal in the eyes who have forgotten
And now give willingly, at gunpoint and up against threats of further slavery
Under the weight that gets heavier and heavier and heavier
So heavy
So wearisome
So taxing
So taxing

Joining In One Force

Delivered May 142019 at the "Keeping The Peace" film premiere event in San Diego during National Police Week. More information: HERE.

Here, in sacred celebration, we meet on common ground
Reclaiming what is ours, rejoicing in what’s been found
Peace of mind, peace in heart, peace in community
The end of the eternal search for a neighborhood unity
Returning to core principles that keep us on one course
Citizens and law enforcement … joining in one force
It begins with a common purpose – a singular, focused goal
It begins with what’s known as “wellness” – of body, mind and soul

Beyond the struggles and conflicts, below all that is mad
Realizing our humanity rests below the vest and badge
Beyond the few bad apples who don’t reflect the commitment here
Below the anxiety, angst, desperation, fright and fear
Healing and health is present now while we all take on our duty
Embracing the grace, accepting the fate, seeing all of the beauty
All it took is just one look below one thin layer
To see the care and selfless service – an answer to a prayer

Though media will publicize the derision and division
We’ll turn the tide, and look inside, and make a new decision
Officers – they see so much yet run towards the danger
Let’s replace with admiration and appreciation any sense of anger
Let’s realize the job they do, and know we are all human born
To hold the line, to protect and serve – yes, they have so sworn
And so shall all hear the call and give from the common source
All of us here, and those far and near … joining in one force

Thursday, March 14, 2019

When I Look Into My Heart

As I wake up in the morning at times to a hurt heart, I thought of writing a poem from the vantage point of what I see when I look within.  I was surprised. 

When I look into my heart of hearts
I find what tears this world apart
A world of war and battle and disease and strife
A world of hatred and anger over this unfair life
A world of gangs and tagging and bravado and stances
A world of dirty tricks, drive-by shootings and angry glances
A world of deep longing and loss and desperation
A world of grief and fear – a world of separation
Where does it all begin; how did it ever start?
I find the answer in my heart of hearts

It’s Isabel and Louise who turned away without a word
Leaving me lost, confused, alone – so hurt
It’s Kelle with her innocent yet mischievous grin
Before her alcohol, drugs and past did her in
It’s a father and a mother who wanted no signs of feeling
Nothing of what I had to say would hold any meaning
It’s a best friend Jamie moving far away – a defector
It’s a sister – my enemy – though I was supposed to protect her
It’s a kindergarten room, like a prison with a guard
It’s the bully who made walking to school just so hard
It’s a teacher who graded me – F, S or E
Even my own art I could no longer see
My identity was put so far up onto a shelf
I lost it all; I lost myself

When I look into my heart of hearts
I find what tears this world apart
My perception, my vision, my filter, my take
Leaving behind myself – my first mistake
It took my writing, my prose, my creativity
It stole my confidence and imagination and ingenuity
It took my enthusiasm, my joy, my innocence
In the depths, it took everything that made any sort of sense
Leaving only the news of the day, with all its dismay
And the heartbreak and anxiety, sure signs of decay
Though when I peer deeper than this surface show
The reality still resides – the beauty forever exists below
I restore, reclaim, remember what has always been
I find the self – and the truth - I am that I am that I am
I find the chance to begin again, with a brand new start
When I look into my heart of hearts
When I look into my heart of hearts

The Same Man

So many masks, but underneath it all perhaps we are merely players on this stage. 

Prisoner, guard, convict, thief
I am all and none of these
Burglar, speedster, judge, police
Playing the game of hide and seek
Embracing all, in one big breath
Give me liberty or give me death
Parts to be acted in God’s odd action plan
I am … the same man

I am the one who just stole your car
The one who stumbles out of that seedy bar
The gambler who lost it all in a risky bet
Then presses a gun barrel right against my neck
The mugger whispering in ear: “your money or your life”
The cheater who cheated with your dear, sweet wife
The liar who lies … into eyes … all of the while
The realtor, banker and lawyer who smiles that slippery smile
The addict that scrounges aimlessly for the next high
The numbed-out who doesn’t even know how to get by
I am the monster, the rapist, the beast, the foe
With nowhere to be and nowhere to go
The solider, armed and dangerous, ready to attack
The enemy, armed and dangerous, prepared to fight back
The rich tyrant dictator with the most evil of plan
The beggar on street corner with outstretched hand
I am … the same man

The hero, the wizard, the saint, the sage
The next messiah bringing forth a brand new age
The eagle that soars to heights of the highest perch
The freedom-seeker who frees all who will search
The one who walks the elder from one curb to the other
I am the love of the uncle, the son, the father, the brother
I am the medicine man who cares for all in this tribe
I am the sharing friend with nothing to hide
I am the supportive ear when you have lost so much in life
I am the steady strength guiding you back into the light
I am the guardian protecting you from the threatening force
I am the provider representing life’s abundant source
The partner who knows what’s mine … is mine to share
The lover who caresses in kindness and care
The magician whose curiosity invites all to understand
The warrior who plants the stake and then takes a stand
The king who carries in heart the most inclusive of plan
I am … the same man

And in my own mundane life ... I too play the parts
Breaking and blessing and rescuing hearts
As pressures and stressors continue to mount
As avalanches collapse upon each bank account
I hold steady to the truth an identity strong
As in “The Who’s Down in Whoville” celebration song
No force can turn me from the right to the wrong
No one can seduce me away from where I belong
I’ll stand in presence – through failure and success
Doing what I must, and doing my best
I’ll falter at times, and I’ll break down in defeat
And yet brush myself off and get back on my feet
No matter where I go or who I have become
Nothing in my past will have to be undone
Moving forward into storm, breaking through the storm cloud
Taking flight into sunlight, with a voice bellowing loud
I am here – for you and me – in God’s destiny command
I ask that – through it all – you come to understand
I will always be … the same man

Saturday, February 16, 2019

Somehow Yours

This one is inspired by our US Constitution, and the horrific tragedy of it being chipped apart, leaving a nation of citizens anything but free to pursue life, liberty and happiness.

Control me, control me
Take what’s mine and do with it what you wish
Use me, use me, use me
Shackle me with iron
Handcuff me with your mind
Whip me into submission
It is your will
To control me, control me
I am what you want me to be
It is, oh master, my destiny

Govern me, govern me
Mother me, smother me
Force your care up my ass
Punished if I go against your plans
Search my soul because you feel like it
My car, my wallet, my cell phone, my pants
Grab my package near the baggage return
Scan my body, my mind, my social media
My phone records, my eyes, my thumbprint
Orchestrate complicated tax forms to elevate your status
Press down hard, like onto a flea, so the blood spurts outward
Bleeding savings and profits, so they can be your own
My debt is your leverage, gifting you capital gains
Stick needles into our children, pin cushions for your power
Test me with your TB
No choices left for those hanging onto the human rights of passage
My rolling stops have you seeing red
So taser the uncontrollable
As your accountants lick their chops
Take what’s mine and do with it what you wish
Perhaps a nice dinner party dish
Catered by butler and maids who bend to your needs
Hotel lobby, government car, all paid expenses of travel and board
No need to hoard
For you have enough
Our hard earned money is somehow yours
Is somehow yours
Somehow yours

Control me, control me
Use me, use me
Shackle me, handcuff me
Whip me with your will
I am what you want me to be
Apparently, it is, oh master, our destiny