Asking the Question Why - Posed for Writer Friend Dylan

(This piece is in response to an earlier blog where I answered the questions posed by a writer friend, found HERE.) 

Returning the favor to Mr. Dylan Stewart, prolific writer extraordinaire, I have some questions. A couple days ago, this fine gent was kind enough to offer up some pointed questions to me about the craft of writing.

Besides being fellow writers, we are fellow Scorpios, and it is said (by my memory anyway) that those born under this watery sign are constantly asking the question “why,” if even subconsciously. It rolls under the surface in their minds. I find myself often asking aloud “I wonder why” to many situations. Well – in the spirit of the great quandaries – I ask these of Dylan (and anyone else who would like to participate):

1.     Why do you get out of bed in the morning?

2.     Why do you live where you do?

3.     Why do you do the work that you do?

4.     Why do you shave your head?

5.     Why do you like Paul Tripp?

6.     Why do you shame people who don’t upgrade their Macintosh computers?

7.     Why do YOU write?

8.     Why do you think people have populated planet earth?

9.     Why have you come to planet earth?

10.  Why ask why?

Note: Please use a #2 pencil. No cheating. This will be graded on a curve. ... Why? Because I said so.

ANSWERS AT THE BACK OF THE BOOK:

1.     I get out of bed in the morning because the other option creates bedsores.

2.     I live where I do because that’s where my bed is.

3.     I work at my job because stores demand that I use the current monetary system. And to possibly buy a new bed.  (Third reference to a “bed.” Due to the comedic “rule of three” I am not allowed to use any more references to a bed, UNLESS it’s an off

4.     I shave my head … to match the carpet.

5.     Paul Tripp would do anything for you if he can possibly do so. He would even pack your table on the back of his motorcycle and drive it all the way from Las Vegas to your town. Not that anyone would ever ask him to do such a nutsy thing.

6.     Mac Users who don’t upgrade gradually over time and instead wait until their operating system is incompatible should be shamed for the fools that they are. Upgrade dammit.

7.     I write because I am.

8.     Earth was populated to allow for the new souls or “sparks of the Godhead” to have experiences in manifesting their thoughts on the physical plane of existence. Or this is all a dream. Like your question.

9.     To dream and dream big.

10.  Why ask why? Ummmm … What?

James Anthony Ellis can be reached at www.LegacyProductions.org.