Saturday, February 15, 2020

It Was Rice!!!

For so long I have been mistaken.

In a pure state of wonder and humility, I had to announce to my wife, my dog, and now all of you on planet Earth who own a device that picks up the Internet and can read these words.

Yes, it was rice ... all along.

Rice! Who knew?

There I was a little kid, loving my rice pudding. Eating it up at snack time, to go along with my baloney sandwich and chocolate PopTart.

One question that came to my mind, but only very faintly in the way back recesses of the gray matter, was this: "I wonder what those soft, skinny, short white morsels are in this pudding?" It was such a fleeting thought, and I didn't take much stock in it. I was too busy gobbling down my pudding.

At the same time, for years - decades even - I had been aware of the food product called "rice," used in such adventures as Chinese Food, beans and rice, and just plain ole "rice" on the side of my veggies. Sometimes it showed up as brown rice, sometimes white, sometimes too hard when it was served as leftovers.

All of this is backdrop for the amazing and enlightening experience I had the other day.

There I was ... this time as a full-grown adult, having a conversation with my wife. The topic was childhood desserts. I mentioned tapioca pudding as one my faves. My wife noted that her grandmother liked rice pudding. After considering how much I too was a fan, my wife then noted her distaste of it, saying, "Who puts rice in pudding?"


It WAS rice in that pudding.

And - check this out ... that is PROBABLY why THEY CALLED IT "RICE PUDDING!!!"
For all my time walking this planet, I somehow have never put it together that those small "rice-like" morsels in "rice pudding" would be "rice."

So ... what's the point?

Besides a funny story to share, it was an opportunity to open my mind and consider what else out there has transpired that I have yet to recognize. What else is there to realize, as I become more and more aware of various viewpoints, constitutions to consider, and subtle messages?

Just as important as the ingredients within rice pudding.

More of James Anthony Ellis' explorations can be found at  

I Speak For The Energy

There is an energy that has been trapped inside of you.

It is I.

Pushed down by years and decades and even lifetimes of suppression, censorship, neglect, avoidance. Perhaps in that order.

Sent asunder in times when you wanted to stand up and say your truth, but another voice told you not to. It shushed you, and I was trapped, building momentum within, like a snowball gathering weight and size in silence.

I speak for the energy.

I speak for the times that you took heed of those who wanted to quiet you, since you wanted to bring up something uncomfortable to them. You wanted to get relief by speaking up about something gone awry. You wanted to point out a broken word or clear out some discord left there, slipped under the carpet ... of denial.

It was so uncomfortable to you. But it was less painful to suppress the thoughts, feelings and, yes, energy than to speak these. For you would be shamed and blamed. And you could not and would not have that.

Until it got too much.

Until I – the energy – became too much.

And you had to say something. You had to give your perceptions words. You had to express yourself. You had to free me.

I speak for the energy.

At first – since you waited so long to give your ideas birth – the energy came out as anger, with an explosion as if claiming, "I'm so upset I kept this in so long! How could I have done that?" And then – as time moved along – the energy arose like a sad song, lilting in your mind, as the expression became tears to wash you clean of the self-betrayal and ... lift you in self-forgiveness.

Until finally, arising like a sun at dawn, that energy underneath it all showed itself to be your truest nature, that divine spark, a truth of truths, a depth unnamed, wanting free expression all along.

Yes, it is here, anytime you want to open up to it. It may not at first be pretty or elegant or effortless, but it will be that which speaks strongest and truest within, forever.

Yes, it is I.

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

Source Material - A Pathway Back to Love

Everything leads back to source.

That's what I've learned over time, through the spiritual realms I have roamed and the emotional healing work I have done.

Years ago, in my early 20s, I set out to heal this weary soul, which was heartbroken over what I believed was neglect and what I experienced as loneliness. I was disconnected from others and disconnected to a source that would - if I acted upon it and let it live through me - sustain me, enliven me and usher in a sense of bliss and joy.

Not that I am consistently connected now, far from it; I often struggle in the pursuit of divine union. But what I've gathered over my healing work, men's work, breathwork, meditation and prayer is that no matter where I start or where I am, this place can follow a thread straight back to my source.

The so-called "positive" emotions and thoughts are easy to trace back.

Happiness = I am on track, connected with purpose and the life-force that illuminates this soul's sojourn.

Now it's those pesky so-called "negative" emotions and thoughts. How could they be anything but misguided and errant? How would these be a place to start on a path towards the light.

We are never left alone, not even in our own mind, dimmed and distracted by darker feelings and beliefs.

Here is one example that comes to mind.

If I am to feel angry, I don't need to remain there. I can follow the thread inward from this starting point.

I don’t need to make it wrong or right or positive or negative.

It’s just what it is – a signpost alerting me to attend to some stirrings within.

As long as I don't judge the emotion, I won't get stuck in it. We get stuck in our beliefs and feelings the moment we judge them. It’s like judging creates a big brick wall that won’t allow us movement or transcendence.
The freedom of the innocent life allows us to graduate level upon level, as long as the surface level (at the time) is acknowledged and embraced. It’s at these times of flow we can follow the thread down.
  • Anger not judged can be seen to be frustration.
  • Frustration not judged can be seen to be fear.
  • Fear not judged can be seen to be loss.
  • Loss not judged can be seen to be sadness.
  • Sadness not judged can be seen to be heartbreak.
  • Heartbreak not judged can reveal a heart so wanting expression.
  • A heart so wanting expression proves the existence of that endearing love.
  •  Love that is freed makes way for the dawn of soul, which has existed since time began.
I have learned that no matter the expression – of heart, mind and even action – there is one motivating force below it all.

Below everything is a force-field and life-force that continually pushes upward like a seed moving skyward through the soil. 

To discover this eternal force, you must simply pull on that thread. Follow it down. With no quit. With a steady breath and a faithful knowing.

It is here, we can find our true calling. And our true self.

Right there at source.

James Anthony Ellis can be reached at

Touch the Sky

moving within
looking for the intention beyond the sin
a place to begin
and never look back
with eyes forlorn
full of scorn
agony born
no no no
the journey towards the present
not the future, the bygone, or a time before
the deepest core
that very first hallway through that very first door
the first pen to paper establishing our story
unveiling the romance, not the horrific or gory
the source of courage, guts and glory
searching, searching ...
our genesis, our start, our true foundation
the origin of heart seen in deep meditation
seeking a simple act of restoration
seeking, seeking ...
to be new again
as we move within
atoning for any sense of sin
so far we can fly
as we let past and future die
as we touch the highest of the high
and rest in knowing - we can touch the sky
touch the sky

James Anthony Ellis can be reached at


Trust me I will be here
Trust I shall not leave
Trust that faith shall be rewarded
Trust and so believe
Find the space to find the time
Sit down and pick up quill
I will arrive amidst the silence
Your mind and heart be still
In that moment a voice will surface
A voice familiar to you
Unmasking the false and faulty tirades
Revealing what’s deeply true

A muse now a known identity
The ending has now begun
We join to be one mighty force
You and I are one
And so together we make our mark
A gift from the trust we shared
A receiver and giver play their parts
The results from we who dared
A poem we bring from our relation
You humbly surrender to prose
No matter if audiences come to listen
The appearance of a nameless rose
Partners we’ll be on into the future
I can not disappear
Trust shall always be rewarded
Trust me I will be here 

James Anthony Ellis can be reached at

Someone Somewhere Smiles

What do I want when I want it?
What do I want when I do what I do?
What is my desire when the creative sparks hit
When my writing decides to come on through
It may take an anguishing writer's block
It may take the first step of 1000 miles
Yet I realize nothing could ever make me stop
Until the time ... someone somewhere smiles 

If it's not a joke or a poke or a silly gag
Then it's a poem, an article, some piece of prose
Turning an audience from the upset, and the sad
To lift them to a place the archangel knows 
Yes, it is that sense of joy that I am after 
To stir up some happiness, lightness and glee
A bonus would be some falling-on-the-floor laughter 
Or even someone having to hold back their pee
Or even a snicker, a snort or perhaps just a grin 
This would satisfy a writer who pours over his art
That would be my championship trophy in a big-time win
Readers who read my words and then land directly into their heart 

So I shall carry on, sometimes early morn or late into the night
Refining the lines, perfecting the meter 
Making sure I write what is right
And playing the game of finders keepers
I shall keep what works and archive it into forever 
No matter the format, the medium or the styles
These words shall always keep us together 
Where, on into eternity, someone somewhere smiles

James Anthony Ellis can be found rhyming other stuff at